I am so excited to be trying something new on Makin’ Macon! If you are following me on social media, then you know that I have started this thing called “Marriage Mondays.” Each Monday, my goal is to share tips, stories, and inspiration to help strengthen your marriage.
Today’s Topic: Communication!
Now, let me preface this by saying that I am not an expert. However, I have had a little bit of practice, working on 26 years of practice. I have learned that communication is crucial to a marriage. When communication is practiced in a marriage, trust becomes a dominant trait. This leads to a fulfilling relationship. It builds intimacy and emotional connection. Plus, it leads up to our next blog post topic, Conflict Resolution, which we will cover next time.
I read a quote recently by Tony Gaskins:
“Communication to a relationship is like oxygen to life. Without it, it dies.”
Are you one of those who becomes silent when your spouse does or says something you don’t agree with? Eventually, the “silent treatment” becomes an infected thorn. If you don’t treat it, it will continue to get more and more painful the longer you wait to remove it. This is why it is better to communicate with your spouse what you are feeling than to keep it all hidden inside. This doesn’t mean that you go charging like a raging bull and say things that are mean and hurtful. This just gives you permission to talk to your spouse in a calm manner and let them know how you are feeling.
I would hate to start a new job, and there would be no communication as to what I was expected to do. If I didn’t know what to do, then I would be as lost as a goose. But with communication, I can start the job with confidence and know exactly what is expected of me every hour of every day.
In a previous blog post, “We’re Just Friends,” I went into detail about mine and my husband’s story and how it all began. I so wish that we had been equipped with the knowledge we now have at the beginning of our marriage. Our first few years might have been so different.
Why Communication is So Important in a Marriage
I am going to be a little vulnerable here and tell you an embarrassing but funny story. My husband and I had not been married for very long. We had gotten into an argument about who knows what. Apparently, it was so petty that neither of us can remember what it was about. What we both remember, though, is what happened as a result of the argument.
I am extremely stubborn, and so is my husband. So when our minds are made up about something, we have a hard time convincing the other about our point of view. We lived on a back road and were driving along, and I think I said something that struck him the wrong way. He instantly slammed on his brakes, resulting in my plummeting forward towards the windshield. I was furious! I opened the door, got out, and began walking back towards our house. I can vividly remember him sitting there for a moment and then start backing up the truck. He kept backing up, telling me to get into the truck. I ignored him, that stubborn streak revealing itself so vibrantly, and kept walking. Eventually, he left. He went to our friend’s house without me. I walked the 2 miles home in shoes that definitely weren’t meant for walking, walked in the door, sat down in the chair, pulled off my shoes, and saw the huge blisters on my feet. I started crying.
Communication would have helped so much in this circumstance!
Both of our stubborn streaks got the best of us that day. We look back and laugh at how young and dumb we were. We realize that if we had just taken a moment to talk, things would have turned out so differently.
Communication Tips for a Strong Marriage
- Stay Calm and Listen – It is important to stay calm and actively listen during conflict. When we are calm, we can think more clearly and respond more thoughtfully.
- Express Yourself Clearly – Use “I” statements and express yourself respectfully. For example, say “I feel upset when…” instead of “You always…”
- Avoid Assumptions – Communicate your needs explicitly to avoid misunderstandings. Don’t expect your spouse to read your mind. Be clear about what you need and why.
- Regular Check-Ins – Set aside time to discuss your relationship and stay in sync. This can be a weekly date night or a simple evening walk where you talk about how things are going.
- Practice Empathy – Learn to understand and validate your spouse’s feelings. Try to see things from their perspective and acknowledge their emotions, even if you don’t fully agree.
- Use Positive Language – Focus on constructive and supportive language. Instead of criticizing, try to encourage and uplift your partner. This helps create a more positive and loving atmosphere.
How Communication Strengthens Marriage
Implementing these communication tips can significantly improve your relationship. For example, practicing empathy and regular check-ins can help you feel more connected and in tune with your spouse’s needs. Staying calm and listening can prevent small disagreements from escalating into major conflicts. When you express yourself clearly and avoid assumptions, you reduce misunderstandings and ensure that both of you feel heard and valued.
Thank you for joining me for the first Marriage Monday post! I hope these tips help you as much as they have helped us. Stay tuned for next week’s post, where we will dive into Conflict Resolution. Trust me, you won’t want to miss it!
I would love for you to share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below. I enjoy hearing from you and learning from your stories as well. Let’s keep the conversation going and support each other on this journey.
Don’t forget that you can read the previous blog post, “We’re Just Friends,” to learn more about our personal story and the importance of communication.
One last thing, I would love for you to subscribe to the blog or follow me on social media for more Marriage Monday content. Plus, feel free to share this post with friends who might benefit from these tips.
Thank you for being a part of the Makin’ Macon community. Your support and engagement mean the world to me. Let’s continue to strengthen our marriages together, one Monday at a time.
Remember, I am always praying for you, even if I don’t know who you are!
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